As many of you will know I’ve been a bit AWOL recently and this is my first blog for a while. There was a lot of self-coaching going on, which can be tough, but obviously when you know the tools and rules it helps!
The decision I had to make was which slice of (what I call) my ‘Life Pie’ was going to have to get smaller in order for my family part of the pie to get bigger.
And I realised it’s a process that might work well for a lot of people over the Christmas period in terms of the busiest ‘holiday’ of the year, so I’ll share.
Firstly, forget 110%. It doesn’t exist, except in agency capacity planners which guarantee you’ll be doing overtime for the foreseeable. 100% is 100%.
And in your Life Pie, if you were to have it all it might look something like this:
Assume, because it’s true, that capacity is 100% (which means you should probably put a sleep-slice in your pie for that).
Here’s the thing, and it’s controversial…
I believe you can have it all.
Just not all at once.
You can have it all in 2016.
The trick is knowing what your ‘all’ is, slicing your Pie and figuring out when some elements need to step up or step back.
So, here are the rules
- Give yourself a break
I realised I needed to seriously up my family-slice for a while, so something had to give.
So for 2 months, Me time was out, and Career had to take a back seat. It wasn’t indefinite; it was deliberate in terms of slices and timings. I knew they’d both be back, in force!, when things were back on track.
It’s an extreme example. Often just as one slice needs to get bigger, one other gets smaller. Sometimes there’s a bit more negotiation needed. And everyone’s priorities, needs and pie-slices are different. Both in terms of people, but also in terms of one individual and the different things happening in their life.
If you’re cutting back on something that affects other people, let them know. You don’t have to tell them why, but you can tell them when you’ll be ‘back on board’ – whether it’s work, friends or gym memberships. Don’t leave them hanging or wondering what’s going on, it’ll be lot easier to get permission rather than forgiveness in this instance.
Can you delegate anything your cutting back on, so that even if your involvement decreases, the ‘x’ keeps ticking along? Whether that’s house duties, workload, healthy eating…is there anyone else who can help, or do more to support you, while you concentrate on the bigger pie slice? Friends, colleagues, paid support (cue VA, cleaner, lite’n’easy etc).
Then diarise it (I know it’s a made-up word but you know what I mean). Seriously, even the down time (for example, from 10-11am tomorrow I’ll hide in the spare room/café/park and read a magazine).
Put it in your calendar.
It’s also really important to diarise when you’ll be readjusting the pie again. If you know this version of your world is a moment in time, that you are making conscious choices about what’s needed now and why, (Mr. Right vs. Mr. Right Now anyone? ;) it can be a powerful way of taking away the pressure of trying to do everything at once; to stop feeling that you’re always too busy, or have ‘so much to do’ all the time.
You have to do this, this and this today. And you’ll get that, that and that done tomorrow.
It takes away the stress, the guilt and allows you to be totally present in whatever you’re doing at any moment.
5. Give yourself a break.
Seriously. Burning out is not good for you or anyone around you. You are allowed down time, me time and over Christmas the family time will be pretty obligatory for most. Figure out what’s important to your happiness this silly-season (what you want), and what you need to do. And if you have to drop anything, put a reminder in your diary for the day you’ll pick that slice up again, what’s the first thing you’ll do?
So, what does your Life Pie look like?
What do you want it to look like in 2016 as a whole year?
And what are your priorities and slice sizes for the next month?
Can you diarise from today until January 31st?
I’ll give you January as an extension of the 2015 Career warm-up for those who need it…
But 1st Feb is Action Stations…
And 2016 is GAME ON!
Coaching spots are limited in 2016.
To get onto the 3 or 6 month Programs starting in the New Year or to find out more,
lock in a 15-minute call with Kate Savage in January!
Just email firstname.lastname@example.org or call +61 406 779 227
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just join us Here or Like us on Facebook!
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